Welcome to my mind

I created this blog so I can have a place to vomit all my random thoughts in relation to how the pickup artistry is affecting my life.

Saturday, June 2, 2012

Ask Chief: Conversational Transitions


Every now and then I get a really good question from a user on MPUAForum.com and I try to answer them to the best of my ability. Here's a question about transitioning from one conversational topic to the next. Specifically, the question is about my style of how to make good conversation with women, which is all about knowing what you seek in women and finding out everything you can about the personality of the woman you're talking to in order to see if she's right for you. "Riter" asks:
How would you transition the conversation? For example, if I want to know if she is outgoing and then later in the conversation I would like to know if she is kind? Basically, transitioning is where I am concerned because sometimes I stay on one topic and I perceive it as dragged out.
There is no one right answer to this question. Different PUAs have different conversational styles, and they would all sound different even if they were all to use my basic conversational framework.

For example, Juggler tells people that "the best transition is no transition." In the context of routines, he tells people to not worry about transitioning from routine to routine and just go onto the next one even if it seems abrupt. You can pull this off by jumping from one conversational topic to the next even if it doesn't feel "smooth" as long as you make that your style.

On the other hand, you've got teachers like Mystery telling people about multi-threading - to start talking about one thing, cutting it off in the middle, starting a new topic, cutting it off in the middle, starting a new topic, and so on and so forth. It might be difficult for a man to maintain his sanity with this conversational style, but it is the language of women.

What I like to do is to continue diving deeper and deeper. I might ask a woman one simple, shallow question like where her hometown is or what her dream was when she was a kid, then I'd continue talking about her while steering the conversation in a very emotional direction. Along the way of finding out deeper things about her on the same topic of her childhood dream job, I will likely find out other things about her, ask her things only somewhat related to the main topic but more related to something else, etc. If I were to visually represent how this system of conversational transitions looks, it would probably look like a tree with a shit ton of long branches and heavy roots. It's almost like you're leading her into telling a very interesting story, and you're showing her how to tell a story in an interesting way. It might help to look up some resources on effective story-telling. This way should make the two of you feel like things are not being dragged out. You're talking about the same topic but you're not talking about the same topic at the same time.

If you're trying to use my style, you'll know that you're doing it right when she's telling you her most intimate secrets.

My open relationship

Among all the girls I've been seeing, there's one who seemed to be more special to me than the rest in a way that made me feel more romantically connected to her. Earlier this week, I started an open relationship with her.

You all know the rules of that game. In an open relationship, both people are free to see other people when the boyfriend or girlfriend is not around. Sounds pretty awesome, right?

I'm not sure if I want to take advantage of this blessed situation I'm in by continuing to see and bone a bunch of other girls. Since I've actually got the freedom to see other girls while I'm dating this one, I don't feel any pressure of being "tied down" or whatnot. So far I haven't felt any inclination toward fucking other girls. Maybe I just have a problem with feeling not free, and I've found a special girl who lets me feel free.

It still feels rather strange to say "my girlfriend" since I'm so used to just playing around and living the awesome single life, but I'm sure it will start feeling alright eventually, right?

-Chief