Welcome to my mind

I created this blog so I can have a place to vomit all my random thoughts in relation to how the pickup artistry is affecting my life.

Wednesday, November 26, 2008

Forgiveness

This is a follow-up to "Obsession": http://chiefpua.blogspot.com/2008/05/obsession.html

A couple days ago I came to grips with the fact that I cannot judge Spin. He's done some terrible things to me, but I still have no right to judge him. Who am I to say that he's a bad guy? I am just as human as he is. It just seems like he's got a sex addiction, and many of his friends would agree. From another perspective he could very well be just as much a victim as much as I saw him as malicious.

"Bros before hos" and "Leave her better than you found her..." Those were our hard and fast rules in the Attraction Theory group, but it's impossible to be completely objective in interpreting those guidelines by their very nature.

To become a man I must face my shadow side. I have to address all my inner demons in order to fulfill my purpose as a man. I'm going to hold a workshop in California on January in 2009, and I'm going to ask him to be a guest speaker. He's got a wealth of knowledge and experience to share ...and I can finally forgive him.

Coincidentally, Spin called me tonight. And he apologized sincerely for the events of long ago. It seems as though he's been doing a lot of thinking and he seems to have matured further than I had expected him to. I'm going to speak to him tomorrow night to get right down to business about the workshop. We're moving forward and letting bygones be bygones.

Truly forgiving someone for their trespasses against you is as hard as forgiving yourself. At the same time, it's so easy if you can just let go of the all the falseness in life that your ego creates... if you just let yourself forgive.

Explore compassion. Compassion liberates.

Tuesday, November 18, 2008

A Matter of Taste

I won't ever be able to sarge and successfully pick up any given woman I set my eyes on. That's impossible. I once held a belief that if you're adaptable enough with your game such a feat would be possible, but that's bullshit.

As I've learned from various pickup sources, learning game isn't about adding on additional layers to yourself. Instead, it's about peeling away the layers that stifle your core. In the end you will want to fully enable yourself into expressing your true core and core intent in an eloquently expressive fashion. This method of learning and practicing the art of pickup (Natural Game) is rooted in the premise that women are naturally attracted to who you truly are on the inside by default; basically, that "being yourself" is the most effective key in seduction.

Layers that stifle your core can include things like limiting beliefs, bad body language habits, inner demons from past trauma, ego, etc. There are millions of things that can stifle you. Being stifled is having any inhibitions from expressing your true self. On the stage, being stifled is letting anything hold you back from skillfully expressing your true current emotional state (or whatever you're trying to communicate) in most sincere and effective way possible.

If you learn to love yourself, to not take yourself for granted, other people will love you, too. As human beings we are all able to relate to each other in some way, but we all have these layers that stifle us from seeing that. Instead, the best we could possibly do without achieving full godly enlightenment is to find certain parts of ourselves that align with certain parts of other people. This is why it is actually possible to not be someone's "type." Everyone is stifled in some way that blocks them from being able to fully relate to certain people that are stifled in some other way.

This is why, no matter how much I strip myself of my stifling layers, I will not be able to seduce any woman in the world. People in general will become attached to some of their stifling layers, creating a phenomenon called "taste." Sure, I will most certainly increase the amount of "types" of women that will be attracted to me by peeling away these layers of mine, but there will always be some women that do not share the same taste as I do. Some women will always not be my "type."

If I never learned to peel away these layers, if I never learned to love myself, essentially no one could really love me. It would be very difficult to generate any attraction within any woman. It really is great to expand that pool of people that CAN fall in love with you, though, by learning the way of the PUA... but in reality can someone with the ability to attract and seduce any woman anywhere really exist? I think not.

I came to this realization while I was playing along to some songs on my guitar just now. When I was a kid I had this dream to be a great singer/guitarist. However, I've always hated my voice. It brought me down to think that I could never win the hearts of music fans with singing talent, even though I rock at guitar.

I then thought about what almost every experienced singer has told me, though. They all echo something along the lines of, "good singing is all about falling in love with your own voice." It's like game. Anyone who hates their voice will sound terrible to others, and will not be able to give a good performance. Anyone who does love their own voice, however, will always be able to captivate the ears of some types of people.

Think about all the famous voices you've ever heard, and all the bands that you love to listen to. I'm sure you know some people that hate some of these singers, and plenty of people that love them. The same goes for a pickup artist; some types of women will throw their panties off in a heartbeat for some pure expressions of Don Juanery while some types of women will be turned off by the same pickup by the same PUA.

The universal attraction switches are still valid, as are the universal rules of music theory. Music theory dictates what sounds good and what sounds bad to an extent, but it doesn't always penetrate the filter of taste. Pickup theories dictate what is attractive and what isn't to an extent, but, again, it doesn't always penetrate the filter of taste. You can follow the rules to dramatically increase your effectiveness in giving a great performance, but you can never win em all.

But who the hell actually cares about winning them all? A "real" musician doesn't concern himself with fame and fortune. Musicians who let their egos get the best of them end up recording a really shitty second album. All that real musicians care about is finding the best and most artistic way to express what they're really feeling. They want to reach the audience that they can relate to the most on the deepest level possible, and so should the pickup artist. Doing so brings a deep sense of fulfillment like no other. This is why so many pickup gurus stress the importance of finding out what exactly you're looking for in a woman because you're exhaustively wasting time and energy if you're trying to focus on attracting ALL women in general.

Find your style, your genre, your target audience. It's all about finding yourself.